Posted in Faith, life, Medical, Religion, Thoughts, Uncategorized

Before You Call I will Answer

Initially I had plans to write about some of the difficulties of starting an Etsy shop when you are basically housebound. That was until my uncle called and said that he was coming to deliver some stuff to our house this afternoon. Even though he was in the middle of emptying my grandmother’s apartment due to her recent death, the fact that he was making the near 3 hour round trip out of the blue struck me as odd. Due to another potential reaction to the super safe iron for pregnant women, my appointment for Monday’s iron infusion had been delayed for another week. And since he and my aunt had made the long trip to our house Sunday to deliver a bunch of furniture, this sudden, unexpected delivery caught my attention, and I could not help but think that God was sending him to our house for a bigger reason.

For the next two hours, except for the fact that both my mother and I felt miserable, things went smoothly, and it seemed that my initial instincts were unfounded. That was until I remembered that the day before we had missed a call from the hospital nurse to see how my mother was doing after her four or five day stay in the hospital almost a week ago due to extremely high blood pressure and chest pain. I did not think too much of the call, and decided that despite the pain I was in, I had better clean as many of the dishes before my uncle arrived, until my sister came rushing over with the phone and insisted that I needed to talk to the hospital nurse.

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Posted in Bible Quizes, Faith, Religion, Thoughts

Happy Sabbath Bible Quiz

Happy Sabbath everyone. I hope that everyone is enjoying a wonderful Sabbath day. I know that for me and my family it is going to be rather tough since it has only been a few days since my grandmother died. She fell asleep in Jesus a few days ago, on my Mother’s birthday. It was a mixed blessing as it is never easy to lose someone you love and even harder on a special occasion like your birthday. But it was a blessing because my Grandmother was suffering. She was 101 years old, blind, and a few weeks earlier had had a stroke that made communicating very difficult for her.

While it is never easy to say goodbye to a loved one even for a few hours, deep down we all know that the Lord did the wise and compassionate thing in letting her fall asleep until He comes again. And from the signs in the sky, in politics, nature, and at every turn, we have good reason to trust that our separation will not be long.

Ironically, I started creating the Bible games and quiz videos because of my grandmother. I had been creating Sudoku, activity books, and notebooks to sell on KDP for a little over a year and I was seeking a way to honor God with my new skills when one day my mother told me how frustrated she was that she was unable to read her Bible because she could not see and she was starting to forget some of the verses.

I felt so bad for her and wondered what could be done to help her. After a bit of reflection and prayer the Lord brought to my mind a new program that he had sent my way that turned text of multiple languages into speech. I was looking forward to showing her the videos I was making and had had just released the first few videos when her health began to rapidly decline. Sadly I was never able to show or tell her about the videos I had made to try and help her remember God’s word.

I wish I knew why my wish of helping my grandmother study and remember the word of God was not allowed to happen. But even though that wish cannot come true, it would be my greatest joy if even in a small way, these videos can prove a blessing to you and your family, and help you draw closer to God, and in some way help you to build a foundation for eternity.

Posted in life, Medical, Thoughts

A Good Day

Finally, after 5 delays due to my mother being hospitalized, my Grandmother having a stroke, allergies, and other chaos, I was able to get my 2nd iron infusion yesterday. I can hardly move today, but it feels so good to have some iron as it make breathing so much more comfortable.

Well the moment I finished that video everything went absolutely crazy. My mother’s blood pressure started rising like an airplane, their were issues with the bathroom, and phone calls galore. And to my dismay issues with uploading my file, turns out my files had to be 20mb or less. In the middle of the chaos, while on step 3 of creating my shop, I did something, who knows what, that locked up my account and got it suspended.

And as an added bonus, after months of slow but steady prep work, I was finally able to open an Etsy shop. Opening an Etsy store was an idea that was recommended by several leading KDP low content You Tube channels as an easy way to diversify. After all, low content creators already have the content used to create their coloring and activity books. With a little mixing, matching, and tweaking, they can easily create digital download activity packs and coloring pages to sell on Etsy.

After several months of utilizing what little energy I had to create a few activity packs, after a bit of prayer I decided that it was time to open my storm. The first few minutes went by smoothly, and I decided to follow the recommendation and create a little video that I could post to Etsy and add a little sound and put on You Tube to show off my new package, On the Go Bible Games and Coloring Pages Printable Bundle.

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Posted in Acrostic Poetry, Anemia, Poems Begining with A, Poetry, Thoughts

A Few More Days

Good news, hopefully anemia will not be controlling my day much longer! I am scheduled to get my first infusion this Thursday. Which is great, because even with the occasional iron pill and daily drinking of the prune, Rasin, grape, and date drink, my hemoglobin is quickly dropping, and it is becoming harder to do even simple task like eating without becoming short of breath. My iron is getting so low that even though I am spending a few minutes in the sun nearly every day to get some natural vitamin D, I am becoming as pale as a ghost.

I am still not a fan of spending most of my day hooked up to an IV, but at this point it is an answer to prayer. It will be so nice to be able to do simple things like stand up and walk down the hallway or get something out of the microwave without becoming winded. While there are many big things, I want to do like complete 5 minutes of exercise on my total gym without gasping for breath or spending ten or fifteen minutes a day completing my next poetry or story book, it is the simple things of life that I am looking forward to.

I am so tired of feeling like a wilted tree that has no power to fulfill its regal calling and proudly lift its branches toward heaven.

Each time my iron drops so low, I am reminded how easily we forget the many little gifts that God has granted us. The ability to eat without feeling like you are going to suffocate, to bend down without fearing that your breath will be completely taken away, or comfortably walk a few feet without hyperventilating are all too often taken for granted. Too often we spend our lives chasing the big gifts, and think ourselves ill-used and believe that our prayers have been ignored because we do not receive the big bonus that we deserved, the funds to take our dream vacation, get a promotion, or some other desire of our heart.

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Posted in Acrostic Poetry, Anemia, life, Medical, Poems Begining with A, Poetry, Thoughts, Uncategorized

Anemia: One Step Closer to an Infusion

Hurray, after more than a month since I got my lab results back showing that my iron saturation had dropped to a 4 (the low end of normal is 15), I finally have an appointment with the hematologist. I wish that I could say that I was looking forward to getting an iron infusion. But while I appreciate the temporary increase in physical and mental energy an iron infusion brings, I am not a fan of having to spend 6-8 hours getting an infusion, and the uncertainty of how I will react. To make matters more difficult, this will be the first time that I have to get an infusion without the companionship and protecting watch of my father.

But even though I do not like getting an iron infusion, my stomach cannot tolerate taking iron pills for more than a few days at a time. After a few days it makes my chronic nausea so strong that I dread meal time to the point that I at times I am delaying and even skipping meals. To alleviate the nausea I have to stop taking the nausea causing my iron levels to sea saw up and down, and slowly causing my iron stores and iron saturation to drop to a point that I can barely lift my head off the sofa and where some days even a few steps leaves me gasping for air.

Fortunately, while I have been waiting for my referral to reach the the hematologist, I found a couple of natural ways to help me get enough iron to help me do one or two task and breath a bit more comfortably. One natural remedy is to drink a bit of beet juice mixed with another juice like grape or apple juice. Mixing it with another juice is important as on its own, probably due in part to its strong flavor, it can be hard to keep down. But mixed and diluted by another juice like apple or grape it become more tolerable.

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Posted in Faith, life, Thoughts, Uncategorized

An Unfulfilled Dream

It was so exciting, our dream of moving to the country seemed like it was going to come true. My parents had brought three beautiful acres in the country, and it would not be long before we left the city life for the peace and quiet of the country. My father was so excited that he every time we visited the he would pull down a few of the thin trees that would easily give way.

He even went to the store and purchased a chain saw so he could cut down and clear the land.

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Posted in life, Thoughts, Uncategorized

A Tough Milestone

Disclosure: This post may contain affiliate links from which I will earn a commission. 

For the past few weeks, I have repeatedly sat down and tried to make a post. But even though my head is full of ideas, as soon as I sit down in front of my computer, the words seem to evaporate, and I quickly find myself mindlessly scrolling through articles I have no intention of reading, doing my best to avoid the painful memories of my first year without my head cheerleader, sounding board, and father.

He was the first one that I went to after hearing about self-publishing and when I decided that I would like to start my own You Tube Channel. When I was ready to start running Amazon Ads, he was the one who helped me with the funds. Whenever it came to major purchases or decisions on what step I should take next, it was his patient ear that I turned to. Without him I felt like a ship without a rudder struggling to weather the storm.

Over and over I felt the pang of loss as I faced a tough decision and turned to look for advice only to be greeted by his empty chair. When a bit of good news such as having 5 books sell in one day or like today when my Poetry Channel finally reached the 200-subscriber mark brought a smile to my face, how fast it faded as I realized that he was not going to be there to share in my simple joy.

Life had already brought enough lonely tears as I watched the mile markers of life pass me by. Locked away by endless days of pain and seemingly forgotten by the world at least I could count on the support of my family. And now that one support, that one precious gift that I had been blessed with, was being taken from me. Love, career, success, friendship, the satisfaction of earning my daily bread, the joy of having my own home, children, independence, and all the pleasures of adulthood had been denied me. Like a time capsule buried in the sand I had watched the years go by, yet my life had remained unchanged. I ate, I dressed, did what I could to maintain my sliver of health, put on a cheerful face, and waited for my chance to become a part of life as I had since childhood. Only now there was one less voice to celebrate the few successes and encourage me when life rained down its many disappointments.

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Posted in life, Thoughts, Uncategorized

Bread Maker A Definite Winner in My House

My father was the baker of the family. Every few months he would make a half dozen loaves of bread and a batch of pizza dough. After I learned that some of my symptoms was the result of food allergies, this special treat became a lifeline as buying bread from the store was nearly impossible. After his unexpected death almost a year ago, I cherished that last loaf, not only because it was a symbol of his love, but with my chronic health issues, making bread by hand was not an option. Therefore there was a definite possibility that this precious loaf might be the last time I was able to have bread.

Years ago we had a bread maker. And once in a while I would use it to make a loaf of bread. But shortly after moving to our new house my mother, wanting to do a big favor, made a loaf of bread. The problem was that she did not realize that this particular model had a tendency to shake rattle and move. And move it did, right off the counter onto the floor which was of course the end of our bread maker.

For years we looked for a new one, but without any success. Then one day a few weeks ago, my mother and sister went shoe shopping during tax free week and was surprised to find a break maker on sale. Fortunately, instead of walking away they called to ask me what I thought, and of course I told them get it.

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Posted in life, Thoughts

Wish List: My Perfect Comfy Office Chair

Disclosure: This post may contain affiliate links from which I will earn a commission.

It is nearing midnight, and I am desperate for sleep. But my little dog Happy who was diagnosed with diabetes a few months ago, was struggling to fall asleep. So like a restless wave he was marching back and forth. We tried taking him outside, adjusting his bed, giving him water, but nothing worked. The only hope was for me to crawl out of bed, turn my computer on, and play some soothing hymns to help him relax and fall asleep.

Unfortunately that not only means that I have to give up my sleep, but I have to spend an hour or two stuck in an uncomfortable garden chair. I used to have an office chair, but after ten plus years of service it had reached the point that its cover was peeling all over the floor (which was not good because if Happy is feeling hungry he will lick the floor in hopes of finding a tasty treat), and it had worn in such a way that it would kick me out of the chair. Finally, since it had reached the point that the outdoor chair was actually more comfortable than it, that it had seen better days.

So now, instead of being able to lean back and relax while the music plays, I have to struggle to find a semi comfortable spot and struggle to do something while I wait for Happy to relax enough so I can crawl into bed.

As I sit here, I find myself wishing for the perfect comfy chair. But what makes the perfect comfy chair. Getting another office chair is the cheaper solution, only it is not very comfortable for a day that I have to spend a couple of hours sitting at my desktop to accomplish a must do task that can only be done at my desktop next to the printer and important files.

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Posted in Faith, life, Religion, Thoughts, Uncategorized

Thoughts about Faith

Faith, it is a very small word containing only five humble letters, yet it certainly is a mighty word. When everything is going right, and the road of life is quiet and well paved, it is really easy to say I have faith and think that you understand what that word really means. But how can you? What faith is required when life is at its best and want and fear have no place in your life.

What faith is required to walk on plush carpets and eat ice cream by the pool? What faith do you have to rely on when your life is like a romantic postcard or an add for a tropical resort? What exercise of heart and mind is called for when your life could be flashed up for the poster image of successful because your every want and need is met for years to come. When your beliefs line up with the crowd and are excepted at every turn as the only way to live, saying I have a measure of faith takes neither courage nor self-denial.

It is not until trial and adversity hunt your steps, when discouragement and disappointment hunt you down like a pack of hungry hound dogs that you really get a glimpse of the depths and power of faith. Because it is then that you have to chose to hold on to faith. It is then that you have to chose to grab hold and cling to faith, that it become more than words.

From our comfortable arm chairs it is easy to look back at the mighty men of faith and say, I would do the same. Or to look down at those who fell short of the mark and say, I would never do that. Nothing would make me lose my faith. I would never chose the comforts of this life over faith in Jesus. If I were in that garden, or if I had been King Saul, or if I had been so and so I would have done this and not done that.

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